What’s your sign?
I’m not hitting on you (well, I might be — wink, wink).
Instead, I’m offering you something different… your Marketer Horoscope.
There’s a twist though. I didn’t write any of these.
I loaded Conversion.ai, selected “blog post intro paragraph,” entered in parameters (subject =”Your horoscope for Aries marketers”; audience = “marketers”; tone = “funny” ) and retrieved three entries. Then I picked which entry worked best (it varied which of the three options worked) and didn’t change a word beyond adding the sign name and dates.
I even asked the AI, named Jarvis, to come up with an intro paragraph for a post entitled, “Why Marketing Horoscopes Matter”:
“Marketing horoscopes are a great way to know what your marketing personality is. The 12 zodiac signs represent the different types of marketers out there: Aries – the creative marketer, Taurus – the analytical marketer, Gemini – the entrepreneurial marketer, Cancer – the nurturing marketer and Leo -the leader. So which one are you?”
Yes, that was written by a bot; I didn’t change a word or even a punctuation mark. Thanks to the psychic powers of Jarvis, an AI-powered copy bot, here is your horoscope.
Aries: March 21 – April 19
Aries is the first astrological sign of the zodiac and typically features a fiery, impulsive personality. In this blog post I’ll cover your horoscope for Aries marketers. First off, you’re naturally competitive so make sure to take on some challenges that will help you grow as a marketer. But don’t forget to be humble about it!
Taurus: April 20 – May 20
In the zodiac, Taurus is the second sign and it corresponds to anything with a fixed quality. You are strong-willed, reliable, determined and persistent. As an earth sign you have a very grounded personality which allows you to focus on your goals and achieve them one by one.
When you’re in charge of marketing for your company or brand, people will expect you to be as dependable as they know Taurus’ are. They might not always see the behind-the-scenes planning that goes into what appears on their screens every day but they’re sure going to notice if something doesn’t work out!
Gemini: May 21 – June 20
If you’re a Gemini, then you represent the third sign in the Zodiac. Your personality is known for being funny, curious and quick-witted. You also have a great sense of humor and are not afraid to make fun of yourself. These traits make you perfect for marketing!
As a bonus, this line from another entry was a favorite, even if the rest of the entry made no sense:
You know that you’re a Gemini marketer if you’ve ever said “I’m not into astrology, but I do believe in the power of personality.”
Cancer: June 21 – July 22
Cancer marketers are on the same team as other water signs, Pisces and Scorpio. This is a great thing because they’re all pretty emotional people who love to feel things deeply. They don’t take criticism well because it hits them too hard–they need their space in order to process and deal with things effectively.
Leo: July 23 – August 22
I don’t know about you, but I can always use a little guidance when it comes to Leo marketing. That’s why today we’re going to take a look at what the stars have in store for us this week.
Let me tell you, there are some interesting developments ahead! The first thing is that Mercury (the planet of communication and commerce) will be direct on Monday, which means that if we want to get our message across clearly now is the time. If your inbox has been overflowing with too many messages lately or if you have trouble getting people interested in your products then this might be just what you need.
The second thing is that Mars (the planet of assertiveness and energy) will enter into Aries on Wednesday
Leo stumped the copy generator; that was actually the sixth one. I liked where the copy for the third one was going:
We’ve all been there. You’re at work and you see the clock hit 5pm. You start to pack up your things and notice that your coworkers are still in their cubicles working away on a Friday evening. “What’s wrong with these people?” we wonder to ourselves as we head out the door for happy hour or dinner with friends. But what if it turns out they were just born under an unlucky star?
It turns out that astrology is not just something from our ancient past that has been proven false by science; it actually can be used to predict someone’s personality traits! And according to some reports, even their job performance! So this week I’m going to focus on Leo marketers because they have
Virgo: August 23 – September 22
“Virgo, the perfect sign for marketers. You’re a people pleaser and you love being in charge of things. Your attention to detail is second to none, which makes you an excellent marketer! This month your marketing will be focused on growth and expansion. If you’re looking for a new way to grow your company or if you want to take it up a notch, this post is just what the doctor ordered.”
That was the first suggestion, and I also loved this one:
You know that feeling when you feel like everyone is a Virgo and they’re all talking about how much they love their sign? Well, this blog post is for the people who can’t stand their horoscope. I’m going to tell you what’s really up with your zodiac sign so you can stop thinking of yourself as a victim of astrological destiny.
Libra: September 23 – October 22
The Libra zodiac sign is ruled by the planet Venus, goddess of love and beauty. This means that all those born under this sign are blessed with a natural charm, elegance and an affinity for beauty.
We know you have an eye for fashion as well as design—but how do you feel about marketing? What does your horoscope say about your skills in digital marketing?
What would happen if there was no social media to share our lives with friends or to promote our business? You might be surprised to find out it’s not just marketers who need digital marketing skills these days!
Scorpio: October 23 – November 21
The scorpion is a symbol of power, intensity, and persistence. This zodiac sign has an unwavering spirit that never backs down from a challenge or difficulty. Scorpio marketers are determined people who won’t let anything stand in the way of their goals.
An astrological analysis of this personality reveals that Scorpios are natural born leaders with plenty of ambition to take them where they want to go. But remember: these folks can be stubborn and secretive when it comes to sharing information about themselves or what they’re up to! If you want the best for your company, include a Scorpio on your team!
I swear that I did not edit a word of that one, even though my birthday is October 24.
Sagittarius: November 22 – December 21
Your Sagittarius needs to be careful of their attitude today. They may come across as aloof, stubborn and critical. This is a bad day for asking for help from others or apologizing. If you are dealing with the boss or supervisor, don’t expect them to understand your point of view today.
This was the only negative horoscope I found. I did love this section from a different entry:
The Sagittarius marketing personality is the most outgoing of all zodiacs. They love being social media influencers because it gives them an excuse to talk about themselves at any given moment.
Capricorn: December 22 – January 19
Capricorn marketers are not always easy to figure out. They are known for being conservative and reserved. However, when you get them to open up they can be the life of the party! They’re ambitious and competitive, but also know how to have fun. The best part about Capricon marketing is that they take themselves very seriously – which means you don’t have to!
Aquarius: January 20 – February 18
Aquarians are known for being creative, original thinkers who like to make their own way in the world. The best thing you can do for your Aquarius marketer is encourage them to share those thoughts with others and experiment with new ideas.
Pisces: February 19 – March 20
“Did you know that when the moon is in Pisces, marketers are most likely to feel moody? They’re also more creative and intuitive. With this knowledge, marketers can use these feelings to their advantage. For example, if a Pisces marketer needs some inspiration for a project or campaign idea they can take time out of their day to read through other people’s blogs or articles and see what comes up.”
This was great too:
If you’re a Pisces and work in marketing, congratulations! You have the perfect set of skills to be successful at your job. You can’t help but think outside the box and come up with creative solutions to problems while also being able to multitask as well as any other sign.
So, what do you think? Are we compatible?
Oh, sorry, that’s a question for another bot.
The best way to sum this up is to return to Jarvis and have the Blog Post Conclusion Paragraph generator do the trick:
“Marketing horoscopes are not just for people who believe in astrology. We’ve shown you how to use marketing horoscopes strategically by considering your customer’s personality and the different stages of their decision-making process to increase conversion rates on your website or landing page. How have you used marketing horoscopes in a way that benefited your company? Share with us in the comments below!”
Share indeed. I’d love to hear about it.
If you get along with water signs, all the better (wink, wink).
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SERIAL MARKETERS SPEEDUP
Join the virtual 1:1 rapid-fire speed-meeting event to connect with fellow Serial Marketers. This will be the last regular Upstream SpeedUp before we move to the new format.
- 5/27 (Thursday), 12 pm
SERIAL MARKETERS SALONS (RSVP on Upstream)
Note: As of June, we will combine Salons and Upstream mixers Wednesdays at 5pm ET. First Wednesdays of the month are in person and the rest are virtual salon + networking hybrid.
- 6/2: First Wednesday (in person)
- 6/9: Eric Wellinghoff, VP Marketing, Nehemiah Manufacturing Projecton Second Chance hiring
- 6/16: Salon (guest speaker TBA)
- 6/23: Marketing Pride with Sabrina Caluori, Martin Obiozor, and Mat Zucker
- 6/30: Steve Markman of Markman Speaker Management and Sandy Sloane of Solutions by Sloane
BETTER TOGETHER: SALES & MARKETING
May 19, 1 pm
Via Serin Silva in the community:
“I’ll be hosting a workshop on how to best align/sales marketing. I’m a veteran marketer and my colleague is a veteran sales coach. Lots to share!”
5 SAVVY WAYS TO USE PERSONALIZED DATA AND ANIMATION IN EMAIL
May 20, 1 pm
Via Randy Levy in the community
“If you are a retail or ecommerce email marketer you are always looking for new or incremental ways to increase conversion rates and revenue. You use AI to develop subject lines, added more triggered emails based on behavior, and improved your inbox placement rate. But the content within your emails still provides a huge opportunity to increase sales and customer satisfaction.”
CULTURAL DIVERSITY FOR DIALOGUE & DEVELOPMENT
“RURAL GAP” EQUALITHON
May 21 – May 30
“For the World Day for Cultural Diversity, Essteem is preparing a Rural Gap Equalithon for rural areas inclusion. Why?
“Some of the most transversal social issues for western countries lie in an educational, cultural, access, and equity divide between rural areas and cities. Let’s try and do something.”
CAN I TRADEMARK AN IDEA? FLY FEMALE FOUNDERS EVENT
May 25, 12 pm
Via Nancy Ruzow in the community
“In this ON THE FLY Workshop, legal expert Michele Berdinis will guide you through the basics of intellectual property so you can protect your great ideas. The workshop will cover the four intellectual property buckets: patent, trademark, copyright, and trade secrets.”
BUSINESS TRAVEL MARKETING’S RESURGENCE
May 25, 11 pm
“Join TripActions CMO Meagen Eisenberg in this discussion about trends with business travel and how the marketing around it has changed.”
ELEVATE: BRAND SAFETY 2021
“Join Adweek’s inaugural Elevate: Brand Safety event as we explore why brand safety in 2021 requires a nuanced approach, how to create engaging experiences while remaining both vigilant and agile to address the changing digital landscape.”
CONVERSATIONS FOR CHANGE: FIRESIDE CHAT WITH LISA BOWMAN
June 1, 11 am
“Lisa Bowman is a champion of workplace equity and is on a journey to use what she does as a marketing leader, and champion of women in the workplace, to make a difference combatting harassment and retaliation.”
June 2, 6pm
First Wednesday keeps going strong. We have dozens of people RSVPing for this fun NYC tradition led by Zack Rosenberg.
SEO SUMMER CAMP
June 24 – September 1
Via Nancy Ruzow in the community:
“Code: RCFF – 20% off! Ruzow Graphics gives all commission earned to our scholarship fund. A 100-day virtual, asynchronous experience for small business owners to improve their digital marketing. You can learn SEO + content marketing skills, find practical tactics to become less dependent on social media, and meet other campers with similar goals and interests.”
SALES AND SCALE LIVE
Via Mike Volkin in the community
“This event has been created for one thing only: to help you scale your business now. That’s why I’m bringing in some of the top business people from around the world. People who have taken companies from $1 million dollar valuations to $500 million dollar valuations and taken companies public.”
Keep checking out the #jobs channel in Serial Marketers for more. Here are some great opportunities shared there or sent to me directly.
Social & Community Manager
Via Yuval Yarden in the community
“The Social and Community Manager will strategically own the development, execution, and measurement of engaging multi-platform community initiatives for Wagmo. Working hand-in-hand with internal cross-functional teams and agency partners to deliver best-in-class content and community strategies at scale.”
THE KNOT WORLDWIDE
VP of Global Product & Lifecycle Marketing
Anywhere in the U.S. except Colorado
Via Chris Gorges in the community
“Reporting to the CMO, The Knot Worldwide is seeking a data-driven customer-focused VP of Global Product & Lifecycle Marketing to lead our Product and CRM efforts across our global portfolio of brands. This person will be responsible for the overall strategy and scaling of our CRM efforts including Product Marketing & Email.”
(PUBLICLY TRADED MANUFACTURING COMPANY)
Chief Marketing Officer
Experienced leader with proven mentorship and leadership acumen in the marketing space, the future Chief Marketing Officer has:
* 20+ years of experience leading (and building) marketing organizations, overseeing budget and performance for omni-channel marketing initiatives
* Deep B2C expertise (B2B experience is also preferred). Ideally has been trained in a best-in-class environment and has been tested in applying their toolkit in an innovative operation
* Consumer-focused, digitally-native marketer with a strong track record of developing and elevating winning/desirable brands
* Ability to motivate their team to achieve/exceed goals and facilitate paths for advancement and growth
* Trust, professionalism, collaboration and a bias for action
Chief Marketing Officer
“Equilibria (“EQ”) is a premium, high-growth, direct-to-consumer CBD platform for women.
An experienced, GM-level leader with proven mentorship and leadership acumen, the future Chief Marketing Officer has:
* 20+ years of experience leading marketing organizations, overseeing budget and performance for omni-channel marketing efforts
* Repeat experience with DTC brands and particularly in facilitating rapid growth from 2-digit millions in revenue to 3-digit millions
* Experience in a health/wellness/beauty “system” product; subscription marketing expertise required”
More via Hunt Club
* G2: Head of Revenue Marketing (Chicago or remote)
* Typeform: Chief Brand Officer (Remote US)
* Linktree: Head of Social Media (Los Angeles, CA)
* Ecosystems Services: Head of Sales (Remote US)
You are a content writer or website manager looking to expand your skills. You enjoy brainstorming ideas, creating complementary content across multiple channels, and developing sales and marketing materials. WITHIN is looking for a Content Writer to help increase WITHIN’s visibility in the marketplace. This is just the starting point in a rapidly expanding company and role.
MCC Operations Manager
Via Howard Greenstein in the community:
“I’m looking for a great customer service, social service and project management oriented type who is looking for a position where they can grow in the nonprofit world. Last person in the role was promoted to a program assistant director. If you’d like to work for a great nonprofit in NYC, and for me as a boss, apply here.”
B2B Content Marketing Manager
New York / Remote
“With the recent growth of our marketing team and company expansion plans, content is essential to growing our customer base and establishing our place as a leader in the CDP space. We need someone who not only is passionate about writing, but can see the big picture and the role content plays in our marketing strategy.”
Brand Marketing Manager
“We’re looking for a Brand Marketing Manager to join the dutchie Marketing Team, reporting to the Head of Marketing. As an early member of our fast-growing team, you will play a meaningful role in building a purpose-driven brand with the ambition to make a significant positive impact on the world. You are a digital native, a trend-spotter, and have a passion for creative, inspiring brand work.”
NYC (remote for now)
“As we scale and continue to build a world-class product, we’re looking for strategic partners who can accelerate our growth and enhance our product and data offerings. In this role, you will be responsible for identifying and executing on our partnership strategy, and you will be measured on the impact of these partnerships and our broader partner ecosystem on Suzy’s business.”
“SellerCrowd is anonymous social network for advertising salespeople. We are looking for a content creator to join the Sellercrowd team to build a must-have daily newsletters for our community. Think MorningBrew or The Hustle for advertising sellers – focusing entirely on info/news to make salespeople more money.”
Demand Generation & Analytics Manager
Via Dori Fern in the community
“We are looking for a passionate, results-driven Demand Generation & Analytics Manager to join our Integrated Marketing team and support our highly successful marketing solutions business unit and its flagship brand, Neustar Fabrick™.”
Director Product Marketing
Via Yuval Yarden in the community
“This role will play a vital role in supporting our new product launches and deploy new messaging and packaging to support the commercial team. Reporting to the VP of Marketing, the role will be the lead on building marketing materials, sales enablement tools, competitor analysis and tactics to accelerate go-to-market initiatives.”
Other job resources:
- Advisable: Get instant access to top marketing freelancers
- AMA Job Board: Listings from the American Marketing Association (maybe you can also ask them anything)
- Beeler.Tech: Job listings for ad operations, programmatic account management, sales operations, and more.
- Built in NYC: Jobs at a range of levels and functions, as long as you’re okay working in this quaint, backwater hamlet.
- CareerList: Here’s a form for companies hiring and a form for job seekers; here’s the public list with tabs for both
- Content Writing Jobs: Content marketers, enjoy
- Creative Women of Color: List yourself in the database and find talent, via Women Who Create
- Demand Curve: Growth and marketing jobs
- ExecThread: Senior roles spanning a range of verticals and cities; membership is free but fully vetted (this uses my referral ID to get you in faster)
- Gently Ventures: Helps scale businesses by finding the right talent
- GLG: Get paid to share your topical expertise; it can lead to some interesting conversations at a potentially decent hourly rate
- Growth Collective: Apply to join this network of notable freelance marketers
- Grace Blue Transitions: A portal for hirers and seekers with resources from this exec recruiting firm
- The Hired Guns: An array of jobs in marketing and related fields at brands, agencies, and media companies
- Hue: Amplifying voices of people in color working in marketing
- Hunterz: A way for connectors to get paid to introduce startups to large enterprises
- Lead5: A paid service for executive roles, plus intel on changes with companies and PE investments; you can try a risk-free weeklong trial to see if it’s any good for your needs
- Lunch Club: Match 1:1 around predetermined goals with accomplished professionals (free)
- NYC Ad Jobs & Networking: A popular Facebook group
- One Club for Creativity: COVID-19 jobs Board
- #OpenToWork: There’s a channel in Serial Marketers where you can share what you’re looking for
- Pangea: Where you can hire college freelancers (and college students can get gigs)
- Pocit: A platform connecting people of color with jobs in the tech industry
- Remotists: Remote startup jobs, chronicled weekly
- Sales Hustle Stack: Find platform-based gigs and other creative ways to earn some extra cash
- Startup.Jobs: There’s a section for marketing jobs
- Teal Job Tracker: A free Chrome extension to manage and enhance your job search
- TechNY Daily: While more technical, there are also some sales and marketing jobs at NY startups.
- VC Job Boards: Aleph, Eniac Ventures, Pear, Sequoia, Union Square Ventures
- VentureLoop: Free startup job listings; their paid option is $15/month and might surface more leads (but it might not).
- Venwise: Submit your job interests here and get in front of their roster of hiring leads; select “Serial Marketers” under “How did you find us”
- Wanted: Wanted helps top talent in tech and marketing find a job at your desired pay.
Do you run or enjoy other job listing sites? Let me know, and I’ll share them.
Below are offers extended to the Serial Marketers community. To share your own or access the Premium member discounts, review membership options here.
Markman Speaker Management: Get 15% off the half-day customized virtual training session “Get Speaking Engagements” for individuals or corporate staff through Sept. 30, 2021. Contact Steve Markman to redeem.
Thece: Get 10% off their Getting Started Kit — just let them know Serial Marketers sent you.
My Software Tutor
Get a 15% discount on live online classes that teach practical, functional, business-centric Microsoft Office software skills (Excel today, PowerPoint coming soon). Use code SERIAL15 to redeem. Premium members get a 25% discount.
Marc Lefton is offering brands a free one-hour consultation on your media mix to show how you can integrate programmatic. For agencies, you can get a free one-hour consultation on how to add programmatic to your service offerings. To redeem, contact Marc by email.
Sign up and use the promo code SERIALMARKETERS to get 20% off on any membership plan. Membership enables you to access all deals with unlimited usage. One deal should more than pay for itself.
Create an account and start a 7-day free trial for $125 in ad spend credit toward your first experiment with this multivariate testing platform. Redeem here. (Premium members get $175 in credit with a custom code)
Following a 7-day trial of this AI-powered marketing tool to generate ads, product descriptions, and more, use code SERIALMARKETERS for 35% off any plan for 3 months (premium subscribers get 50% off for 4 months).
Get lifetime access to this file management tech with three seats, all free. (Premium members get five seats; see the Slack channel for details and a custom link.)